The Weird, The Stupid, The Freaky
by DA Sly
Summary: Back and better than ever, completely revamped and rewritten. Amy has her eye on Shadow, but someone from Shadow's entirely made up by me past gets in the way. Throw Sonic into the mix, and ya got a love square! Better than it sounds!
1. Chapter 1

Finally! It has been re-written and re-submitted (fourth time now)! Not much else to say. Different cast, cause I'm pretty sure any OCs that were pledged to the old version of this fic are officially expired. Sooo, instead I will use Kain (you may know him from Roomies Insert Cheap Advertisement Here ) and I dunno. Someone else. I'll figure it out when the time comes. My writing style has definitely changed (whether for the better or worse I have no idea). So anyway, mostly same characters, same plot but different content.

DISCLAIMER: Yeah been there, done that. I'm sure you've heard the disclaimer 100 million times so I'll make it quick "I DO NOT OWN SONIC OR CREW!!!".

**Chapter 1: The Madness Begins**

Peaceful hedgehog, sleep on and let nothing disturb thy slumber. That's what Sonic was thinking bitterly as he sipped coffee sleepily, at the kitchen table. Ten minutes ago, the cheerful chattering of the birds had woke him up. Since he couldn't get back to sleep, he performed his morning rituals cursing the idiot who had invented birds. To deepen his irritation, the biggest faker ever, Shadow was sneering mockingly at him. To top that, Amy was cooking. Insert grimace of disgust here.

"OI! Cooking slave! Where's my food?" Amy spun around glaring. Tails sat waiting his fork and knife clutched in both fists. Sonic had fallen asleep on the table. Shadow had turned his sneer to Cream, who was staring a Tails.

"Morning guys!" Knuckles yelled loudly as he entered the kitchen. Sonic sat up with a start.

"Why is the rum gone??!!" Everyone stared blankly at him, except Shadow. Shadow once again was sneering at him.

"There is no rum idiot." Shadow said, sneer still on his face.

"Why's Sonic up so early anyway?" Knuckles asked. Sonic's face darkened.

"Those damn birds! They woke me up. Hey Knuckles, where's your twelve-gauge at? I'm going to shoot them down, and then make bird fillet." Knuckles shrugged.

"I think I lent it to Biggs. He was saying something about being recruited for that Resident Evil series."

"Are you serious?! Who am I gonna buy my hash from now?" Tails groaned holding his head in his hands.

"Breakfast is ready!" Amy trilled. Tails instantly brightened up. Knuckles pretended to throw up. Shadow snorted. Sonic covered his ears.

"Not so loud!" Sonic said letting his head thud onto the table.

"Jeez man, are you hung over? What did you two do last night?" Knuckles asked. Shadow grinned. Sonic looked thoughtful.

_**Flashback**_

"_Yeah bitches! SMACK MY BLUE ASS!!" Sonic shouted at some good-looking echidna girls. They gave him appraising looks, but turned away._

"_Sonic, as funny as this is I think it's time we go home." Shadow said smirking._

"_Mutiny on my ship?! I'll have you walk the PLANK!"_ _Sonic growled staggering towards Shadow, his bottle of rum raised high. Shadow snatched the rum and handed it to some underage kid._

"_Thanks mister!" The kid started chugging it and the he passed it around to his friends. Sonic stared at his empty hand._

"_Not good! Not good!" Shadow grabbed his arm and started pulling him to the exit._

"_Sha…Shag…Shad…SHADOW! That's the name! Where's my rum?" Shadow sighed._

"_The rum's gone."_

"_But w…why's the rum gone?" Sonic asked before promptly passing out._

"_You owe me one faker." Shadow muttered before slinging the passed out Sonic over his shoulder with minimal difficulty._

_**End Flashback**_

"Nothing." They chorused. Knuckles raised his eyebrow. Just at that moment, Amy dumped a plate full of waffles in front of Tails.

"Yay! Waffles!" Tails cut it up in a matter of seconds and put a portion in his mouth. "It's good." He said chew thoughtfully. Shadow, Knuckles and Sonic looked at each other.

"Wait for it…" Sonic said with a smirk worthy of Shadow. Tails suddenly choked.

"Ugh! That's fricking nasty! What did you put in this?" Amy frowned.

"Nothing. It's a tofu waffle." Tails spat it out.

"Tofu is nasty. Make real food for once!" A vein popped up in Amy's head. Pulling out her hammer she punted him with it. He flew from his chair, through the open door leading to the basement and rolled down the stairs, with a big thump.

"Don't insult my cooking!" Sonic, Shadow and Knuckles burst out laughing. "What are you laughing at?!" Amy growled menacingly. They instantly stifled their laughter.

"I don't feel hungry." Sonic commented before quickly shooting into the living room, firing up the Playstation 2.

"Um…I forgot, I need to go wake up Rouge." Knuckles said shiftily before speeding into the living room after Sonic.

"I'll go help." Shadow said, following. Amy stared after the three. She turned to Cream.

"Rouge's room isn't that way…" Cream shrugged going down into the basement, probably to help Tails. Rouge emerged from the entrance to the kitchen, yawning.

"What did I miss?"

**Meanwhile…**

Sonic, Knuckles and Shadow were gathered around the Playstation 2, mashing buttons and playing Soul Calibur III on Sonic's widescreen plasma T.V. Hey, being the hero has benefits you know.

"Oh baby! Twenty hit combo! Man you suck at this game Shadow." Knuckles laughed.

"Shut up. It's cause Sonic keeps picking pansy ass characters for me like that damn Talim chick." Shadow growled.

"Shut up! She's just misunderstood!" Sonic wailed.

"Fine! YOU use her." Shadow snarled thrusting the controller at him.

**Few moments later…**

"I can't believe it." Knuckles said, staring wide eyed at the screen. Shadow was gaping at the screen.

"Alright!! Go Talim, Go Talim! It's ya birthday!" Sonic cheered.

"You just got a two hundred hit combo…" Shadow trailed off.

"Three times in a row…" Knuckles added in shaking his head. Tail limped into the room, and fell heavily on the couch beside Sonic.

"You know, I hate it when Amy cooks." He commented rubbing his head.

"Me too." Sonic said.

"What was that?!" Amy called coming from the kitchen.

"Shittake mushrooms!" Tails dove under the couch. The four smiled innocently. She gave them a suspicious look before going passing through to go upstairs. They all sighed in relief.

"That was one close monkey humper." Tails commented. The other three inched away from him. "What?"

"Nothing." Sonic muttered. Just then, Rouge swept in yawning some more. Sweeping herself past Tails, Sonic, and Shadow she casually sat in Knuckles' lap.

"Morning Knucklehead." She cooed. Knuckles flushed, as the other three present laughed. Tails got up.

"Gotta go locate a knew hash dealer. I heard Froggy has some mean stuff." Sonic got the hint too.

"Well, I guess you and Rouge can play. Try not to let her whoop your ass too many times." Knuckles glared at Sonic. Shadow grinned and got up to leave. Sonic followed suit.

"Hey Shadow wanna go to Mario's place and steal their pizzas?" Sonic asked.

"You need to ask? That fucker and his brother have it coming." Shadow said smirking. Knuckles gulped as Rouge pounced on him.

"Now where did we leave off last night?" She asked seductively. Just then Cream came in.

"Ew gross! Do that in your room!" Cream cried covering her eyes and dashing for the stairs. Rouge sweatdropped.

DA Sly: Well that ends the first episode of The WSF. Tune in next time and be sure to review!

Mario: It's a me _Mario_


	2. The Madness Continues

Sorry about the gap in updates.

'Blah Blah' – Thoughts.

"Blah Blah" – Spoken Dialect.

Songs Listened To While Writing: Aerosmith – Rag Doll, Love In An Elevator, Walk On Water, What It Takes, Dude Looks Like A Lady, Eat The Rich.

Disclaimer: ME NO OWN ANYNOTHING

**Chapter 2: The Madness Continues**

It was now mid-day, and all seemed quiet on the western front. Not even kidding. There was nothing. Yep. Somewhere a door creaked open, and two shapes flittered up the spiral staircase to Sonic's room. The two stowaways shiftily secured the area before stepping into the light. Two figures, clad in clumsily made costumes of…Shadow and Sonic?

"They'd never have guessed it was us right Shadow?" Sonic chuckled with glee, taking off his Shadow costume.

"Indeed…I have to admit it was a pretty ingenious plan." Shadow peeling off the Sonic suit. The two grinned gleefully at their loot. Ten boxes of pizza, all with the trade marked Mario Brothers stamp on them. Shadow had a sudden thought.

"You DID disable the security cameras right?" Sonic looked puzzled.

"There were security cameras?" Shadow smacked his forehead.

"You…IDIOT!" Shadow growled. Sonic shrugged.

"At least we were wearing disguises." Shadow now looked at the costume he had been wearing for the first time, and sweat dropped.

"Leave it to the faker…" Shadow mutter mutinously, before grudgingly accepting a slice of the best pizza in the world. The door burst open and a making out Rouge and Knuckles fell into the room. Sonic made immature gagging noises. Knuckles looked up, his mouth forming an "O".

"Sorry wrong room. Hey cool, pizza!" Sonic and Shadow looked at each other.

"Grab the pizzas and RUN! I'll hold them off!" Sonic yelled heroically.

"Don't mind if I do." Shadow snatched the pizza and jumped out the window.

"HEY! Come back here! I didn't actually MEAN it!" Sonic followed suit. Rouge raised an eyebrow, and looked at Knuckles.

"Meh. My room or yours?" Knuckles shrugged. Suddenly Rouge had a devilish thought. "How about…" She whispered something in his ear. Knuckles grinned.

"You're evil." Rouge smirked and locked the door.

Tails hid under the couch as Amy passed by. Once he heard the footsteps fade away, he darted across the room to his closet. Opening it, he darted inside. The place was filled with nets, dart guns, water guns, ski masks and goggles, a rather large knife, a mini-fridge and desk with a computer. The place also had a cot attached to the wall and a bear carpet on the floor. In short, the closet was much bigger than it looked.

Tails immediately sat down at the desk, and opened up a surveillance screen. It showed every room in the house, and what was happening. Everything seemed all right. Amy was fixing lunch, Shadow was nowhere to be seen, and Cream was writing in her diary. Seeing some activity in Sonic's room he chuckled. The poor hedgehog had probably got himself drunk again. Clicking on the image, he pulled up a live feed of Sonics room and stared transfixed at the screen.

"…those are HUGE!" Ten minutes later, we find Tails curled up on the couch in a fetal position muttering nervously to himself.

"So big…had to be fake…plastic surgery…" Sonic plopped down beside him.

"Damn! I lost that little asshole. Took all the pizza too!" Sonic exclaimed. Crossing his arms to pout he glanced at Tails. "What's your story?"

"They're too big…like two watermelons…" Sonic raised an eyebrow.

"Never mind. I don't want to know." Tails shuddered.

Shadow smirked to himself as he sat on the bench swing in the back yard.

'Man this is some good pizza. Too bad me and Sonic are probably going to get shot up by some poser Nintendo ginos in the next few days.' Taking another bite of his 5th slice, he curiously observed Cream and Amy carrying a box with a precariously balanced crate marked "Dead Chickens" on top, out the back door. Raising an eyebrow he finished his pizza and stashed the rest away in a secret spot.

'Time to gloat!' Speeding through the back door, and bumping Amy (causing them to drop the boxes, which curiously enough actually contained dead chickens) in the process, he proceeded to plop on the couch beside Tails.

"Hey traumatized adolescent. Yo faker." Sonic glared at him, and Tails continued to rock back and forth.

"You jacked the pizzas, and left me to be beaten to death by a pizza crazy bat. You ate them all didn't you?" Sonic accused. Shadow gave him an angelic look.

"Would I really do something like that?" Sonic thought for a moment.

_**Flash Back**_

_Sonic happily sat on a park bench wearing a shady disguise (the sunglasses, trench coat, and hat business), with a big ass sub. He was about to take a bite when Shadow plopped down beside him._

"_Yo faker." Sonic grunted and was about to continue, when Shadow interrupted again._

"_Whatcha got there?" Sonic sighed._

"_A sub." Shadow smirked._

"_Can I have a bite?" Sonic looked at him like he was crazy._

"_Are you serious? This cost me four bucks! HELL NO!" Sonic exclaimed. Shadow sighed._

"_Well, I guess it would be a shame if that group of rabid fan girls over there found out who you really are." Sonic narrowed his eyes._

"_You wouldn't…" Shadow cleared his throat._

"_Oh look! It is I! Sonic The Hedgehog!" Smoothly knocking off Sonic's hat and glasses, and grabbing the sandwich, Shadow dashed off._

"_Shadow! Wait up man! DON'T LEAVE ME!!" Sonic disappeared under a mass of crazed fan girls. _

_**End Flashback**_

"Yeah…You would…" Sonic said. Shadow laughed nervously.

"Marry me. Haha." Sonic raised his eyebrows.

"Screw you." Shadow, seeing that his gloating had not gone as planned, ran off. Sonic sniffed suddenly.

"What the…is that…?" Turning to Tails, he saw the fox with glazed eyes, puffing on a joint. "Tails, man! What have I told you about getting high in the living room?!"

"Man…You was like 'My names Sonic! Don't smoke shit in here. RAWR!'. It was funny!" Tails gave a blank sort of laugh. Sonic shook his head in disgust. Leaving the room he went up to his room, probably to try and catch some Z's. Sonic opened the door and flipped the light switch. Walking over to his bed, was about to collapse on it, when he noticed something on the sheets.  
"Son of a EGGMAN! THAT IS NASTY!!!"

DA Sly: And so it ends ;)

Sonic: Jeez man, that was really classy. Get Knuckles to skeet on my sheets.

DA Sly: I know…seemed like a good idea at the time…

Tails: Review…and stuff.


End file.
